what does excercise have to do with it?

Tipsy Tart: I was in bath last nite telling Dh about u girls going for boob jobs etcso he said that if i fall preggers again and go for c-section i can have mini tuck and boob lift!!!!!!!he says i deserve it after 2 kids (blush)

Faulty: ooooooohhhhhhhhhh LUCKY YOU

Tipsy Tart: i know - now i cant wait to fall pergnant lol

Faulty: dont stress bout falling pregit takes longer

Betty boob: tha't fab!!

Tipsy Tart: thanks for the advice Faulty lol
my vjj is tired of all the pomping anyway

Betty boob: good!at least you're doing your homework!

Faulty: when ever i go on diet i fall pregnantso i not going on diet and never excercising

Tipsy Tart: what u call that lube stuff - we have a blue one - and its up already - so now u know...........

Betty boob: KY

Faulty: all the other pregnancies just didnt last

Betty boob: hell so you got a great excuse to NOT diet

Faulty: when i decide to loose weight and get fit - bam pregnant in a monthso no getting thin and no healthy lifestyle NO NO NO

Betty Boob: sounds great to me!

Faulty: maybe in 4 years time i will think about being healthy and thin again

Betty Boob: lol AND pregnant

Faulty: yip bwaaaahhhhhhaaaa i decided that if i want kids to make my family as big as i want i gonna have to have two sets of twins, well if i wait a few years inbetween i gonna be so old

Betty Boob: bwahahahaha

Wayne's World

Betty boob: TT are you real?

Tipsy Tart: am i real?

Betty boob: yes

Tipsy Tart: depends......

Betty boob: ha ha

Tipsy Tart: u ever watch that movie about the guy who made a celebrity out of that computer program, im like her
this is my computer talking boooooooohhhhaaaaaaaaa

Betty boob: omg you a nut

Kamasutra: simone

Tipsy Tart: SIMONE!!!!!! it is I, wayne

Kamasutra: WTF

Tipsy Tart: c its working already

Vlam: i'm lost

Tipsy Tart: i'll come find you, might take a few weeks, but DONT GO ANYWHERE

Betty boob: OMG you are so weird

Tipsy Tart: OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG - are u having sex there BB, with all the swearing etc

Betty boob: yes with my hand - why do you ask?

Tipsy Tart: coz I c u

Kamasutra: you should really become a stand up comedian

Betty boob: bwahahaha

Gifts and gadgets

Vlam: next year we all put our names in a hat and we pick each other and buy stuff like this.... stuff we will all like and USE not WASTE.....

Tipsy Tart: ditto

Ditsy: i agree! we can do valentines day and mommy's day and our birthdays AND Christmas

Vlam: hahaha slow down eager beaver.. u just want alot of sex toys...geez women

Ditsy: OF COURSE! imagine the variety we'd have! we'd NEVER complain about our libidos again

Vlam: lol ja.. u'd better stock up on rechargeable batts...

Ditsy: and we'd all be skinny cause of all the humping and orgasms grrrrrrrrr our men will WORSHIP us

Vlam: now well thats a plan....

Ditsy: bwahaha! see - not just a pretty face hey!

Tipsy Tart: why didnt u guys tell me my friend was lookign for me :@

Vlam: oh sorry i thought you know them being your peeps and all...

Ditsy: i did DINGBAT go read up there ai wee jy moet jy ALTYD so dof wees?

Vlam: hahaha again, pot calling kettle black... hahahaha

Tipsy Tart: bwah joh - cant believe i almost missed an invite to suip - shocking

Ditsy: absolutely NO comment whatsoever!

Vlam: seems like u've had enough already

Ditsy: sighs LOUDLY

Tipsy Tart: laughing at u all

Ditsy: moers Tipsy Tart off her chair

Tipsy Tart: another glass of wine

Ditsy: drinking at work! Shocking!

Tipsy Tart: i wish.........

Ditsy: seems i won't have to hit you off that chair, you'll fall off ALL BY YOURSELF

Betty Boob: jis you lot can talk kak, i'm outta here

Ditsy: trained by the best babe

Alcohol + sex = Ditsy

Tipsy Tart: so Boss Lady - u miss me much?

Boss Lady: offcourse I do

Tipsy Tart: I miss u - not sex talk for a while hey

Betty Boob: ooh i got a question!!!

Vlam: tell us we tell u if its good or not...

Betty Boob: well i just wondered - has anyone's husband / boyfriend had a pee IN YOU while you shagging or is that impossible

Ditsy: DISGUSTING!!

Boss Lady: OMG

Tipsy Tart: lol

Vlam: FUCKING DISGUSTING

Boss Lady: PMSL NOOOOOOOO

Betty Boob: yes but is it possible?

Boss Lady: I have never even thought about that

Vlam: don't think its possible and don't wanna try either...

Tipsy Tart: maybe - if it happened we were most likey very drunk hahaha

Betty Boob: ha ha ha ha TT

Vlam: i can't have sex when i'm drunk all i wanna do is either puke or pass out

Betty Boob: well we were about to do the dirty sunday morning, when the man said he really needs to go pee first and then the thought struck me

Tipsy Tart: BB - DH also usually says he needs to pee first otherwise his balls pain afterwards

Ditsy: my life is so boring, all i do is carry aliens

Tipsy Tart: Your Man is trying to keep you pregnant coz APPARENTLY you and alcohol = bad idea

Betty Boob: yeah she pukes all over him

Vlam: PMSL sis Ditsy

Ditsy: yeah well, too much alcohol and the boobs come out and then a bit further and i pass out

Tipsy Tart: NO - she out drinks and out parties him - he cant keep up - oh and he whispered that she embarasses him bwah

Ditsy: and the problem IS?

Betty Boob: exactly

Tipsy Tart: dittoDitsy - im like that sober haha

Betty Boob: i'm lank embarrassing when i'm drunk - it's great

Vlam: i get loud and giggly.... oh and i smoke. (puke)

Tipsy Tart: so am i BB - out of body experience - thats my story and im sticking to it

Boss Lady: I am embarasing and I don;t even need a drink

Tipsy Tart: stick with us - we kak cool

Ditsy: i dont need no alcohol to be fun or embarrassing

Once upon a time my feet stank

Tipsy Tart: my feet stink

Betty Boob: bwah gross!

Tipsy Tart: wearing pomps

Betty Boob: pomps? bwahaha

Ditsy: its when you have sex mel, you pomp except Tipys Tart having the plural

Tipsy Tart: well what u call those ballerina shoes

Betty Boob: PUMPS

Ditsy: oh so its NORMAL to have stinky footsies when you wear those? was wondering hey

Betty Boob: well mine don't stink

Tipsy Tart: ok - putting them back on /me feels dazed and confused / intoxicated

Betty Boob: bwahaha

Tipsy Tart: jirre u know

The day Bettyboob lost 10kg...

Tipsy Tart: hey u bitch - i enjoy the occassional insult BUT I CANT BE RUDE TO U ive got some good insults lined up tho - but it seems too rude to post - i cant do it (blush)

'u are not urself today - i noticed the improvement immediately; bwah
wheres Betty Boob

Betty Boob: fuck off man i went for a crap

Vlam: to much info thnx Betty Boob

Ditsy: lol dont remind me, yesterday i went to the loo

Betty Boob feels 10kg lighter

Ditsy: and the bathrooms are right next to each other so i went in for my wee and someone went in next door

Vlam: did u see another guy's dick again...

Tipsy Tart is inlove with Betty Boob - she is crude and rude

Ditsy: next thing you hear: BOINK sheesh, that mustve been one hell of a crap hey!!

Vlam: PMSL.... he was playing battleships man...

Tipsy Tart: haha

Ditsy: lol

Vlam is now also needing a crap ;)

Betty Boob: hope it's a stinker!

Ditsy: sheesh, if we like this without alchohol, imagine WITH alchohol

Vlam: oh fuck... spare us that

Ditsy: i might show you my breastesses

Betty Boob: bwah ok can't wait!!

Vlam: i'll have to now start giving dh LOADS sex to convince him.. oh ja and start saving...

Betty Boob: don't allow me to swim when i'm drunk i think i'm a dolphin

Tipsy Tart: thats reminds me - i fucking sang to boere music last nite – disgusting

Ditsy: NO!! did you dance too?

Vlam: bwahaha thats how i knew she was pissed....

Tipsy Tart: i LOVE sambuca - i c u guys planning a trip to CT

Vlam: yeah baby

Tipsy Tart: we stay at my house, we closer to the clubs and pubs and we have a pool so when we wanna be mermaids only the perv next door will c hahaha

Vlam: fuck i'm gonna have to start eating only lettuce so look good next to you skinny bitches...

Tipsy Tart: bwahahaha ok now i'm gonna go eat cake and practice my mermaid moves on the floor

Ditsy: lol! shit now i gotto go to the loo

Vlam: lol take pictures...

Ditsy is blushing like mad hey

Vlam: not the loo, the mermaid practising

Tipsy Tart: haha Ditsy
ok - there must be something in the air - now i need to crap lol

Vlam: lol def in the air..

Ditsy: so have we all had our daily poop then?

Betty Boob: i'm back and i'm stuffed, prolly gonna have another pooh later

Ditsy: NO MAN, just as i took a bite out of my toast

Betty Boob: bwah hope you don't have peanut butter or something thick on it

Vlam: FFS sis

Tipsy Tart: thats nasty
u really need to get ur face fucked Betty Boob

Betty Boob: what? your grammar is shocking I don't understand what you're trying to say

Vlam: bwahahaha

Ditsy: lol – sarcasm

Tipsy Tart: shame its understandable seeing as u have the elitricy of a 5yr old

Betty Boob: literacy? is that what you are trying to say? sorry i'm too clever
i don't get what you're saying

Ditsy: bwahaha!! dingbat

Tipsy Tart: theres absolutely nothing wrong with my grammar - im shocked

Betty Boob: bwah, ok if you say so

Tipsy Tart: Vlam talks in past tense

Betty Boob: did you finish school?

Tipsy Tart: you guys are irritating

Ditsy: we KNOW babe, we KNOW that's why you LOVE us you want to KISS us

Tipsy Tart: ag fuck off man

Betty Boob: you thrive on all the attention we give you

Ditsy: where to?

Betty Boob: bwah

Tipsy Tart: wait - 'u want to looooooooove me, you want maaaaaaaaaaary me' haha i love that song
I dont mind insults - but u guys are ATTACKING me today

Betty Boob: did you take a photo of your crap by the way

Tipsy Tart: oh my fuck TMI but i couldve - fucking floater i flushed 3 times and the bathroom is next to my colleagues office so he has no doubt what i was up to haha

Betty Boob: bwahahaha how blind!

Ditsy: you girls are DISTURBED i tell ya, you corrupting my Koek mind!

Breaking up is always hard to do

Vlam says: morning, monday... bleah - how u lot all doing?

Jaggi says: (wave)Morning!!! Hope you all had a stunning weekend???
Vlam - did you get your DSTV??? WE DID!

Faulty says: i got a little bit drunk on sat

Jaggi says: :Faulty!! You got drunk??? NEVER!!!

Faulty says: but i didnt end up in the jacuzzi which is a good sign lol

Kamasutra says: morning girls

Jaggi says: (wave)morning!!!

Bettyboob says: hello lovely ladies :)

Tipsy Tart: ZZzzzzzzzzzzz

Bettyboob says: eish - did you have a good one TT?

Faulty says: my dinner on friday was FAB by the way

Bettyboob says: really?

Bettyboob says: i'm impressed hey!

Faulty says: yep i even ate it+ lol

Bettyboob says: was the steak not a bit tough? hey did you get my pic i sent you yesterday?

Faulty says: nope it melted in my mouth

Jaggi says: (rofl)OMG I am slow

Bettyboob says: or did i send it to the wrong person? Bwahahahahahaha hello Jaggi

Faulty says: no i got it lol but my phone went flat couldnt reply -looks fucking sore

Bettyboob says: oh ok, just as long as it went to the right person ha ha ha

Jaggi says: So BB...wheres my photie of the tit in discussion?

Faulty says: aggg shame Socks and Ben broke up last night

Bettyboob says: bwahahaha WHY Faulty???

Faulty says: im not sure she hasnt spoken about it

Bettyboob says: ok

Faulty says: she just came through in tears and said they broken up. i didnt know what to do hey, i htough i would give her icecream cause in the movies that makes everything better but being the good cousin i am i gave her a stong pain tab and wine

Jaggi says: Shame Faulty! How long were they together?? And is it a definate break up or those who break up and make up as the tides change?

Faulty says: but i not gonna wake her up i think she is hung over, she had herself 2ltrs of wine bwahhaaa, im such a good cousin really

Bettyboob says: OMG ha ha ha ha ha she gonna feel terrible!

Jaggi says: Nothing cures pain quite like wine..til the next morning!

Faulty says: yep but it will distract her from the break up for a while

Jaggi says: Shame she needs cream soda, panado's and naar pille

Faulty says: i know they had a HUGE fight on friday and she ended up going to ballito with her friend to get away and then when she came home on sat i could see she was upset but i was too pissed to care then last night they were here and they were very quiet in the lounge so i got the drift they needed to talk so i came and harrased b and robin on skype and then thats when she came through

Bettyboob says: oh shame man :(

Faulty says: im sure she will tell us all the story, but for her to dissapear to ballito spur of the moment must have been something bad

Bettyboob says: oi, i wonder what's up

Tipsy Tart: i wonder whether sum1 didnt cheat, maybe her or him?

Faulty says: no i dont think so-- i think its more to do with his drinking maybe-- and he very possesive over her but you never know hey

Tipsy Tart says: whats the FB link for? I dont think mines opened on the right place

Faulty says: i was drunk and thought i was a motorbike person, argg i really embarresed myself myself and candi polished off 5ltrs of wine each

Jaggi says: :OEEK!!! (puke)

Faulty says: i felt very sorry for myself yesterday

Jaggi says: Jy wil mos!!! My liver will jump right out of my stomach if i try that shit again (chuckle)

Faulty says: to be honest i think i am still trying to recover but its ok keiths client loves me bwahhaaaa

Kamasutra says: TT how was the meet on Saturday?

Jaggi says: (rofl)Did you take photo's?

Tipsy Tart says: lizelle took pics with her fancy camera so i didnt wanna whip out my 1940's canon lol

Jaggi says: oh! Wahahaha I hate those Larny's, but i take better photo's anyway (NOT!) but i will keep telling myself that

Tipsy Tart says: Lwas his usual naughty self so dont believe any of the stories u hear about him being cute or whatever

Kamasutra says: did you hold C?

Tipsy Tart says: no i was too scared, but i did have to watcher her and then i forgot! I actually walked away and left her on the table bwah - then lizelle called me and said, arent u watching camryn haha, but dont tell Ditsy

Vlam says: my fucking brother just irritated the shit out of me.... he is naggingly irritating... totally fucked up my day...... breath in.. breah out...

Tipsy Tart says: Ditsy looked so pretty, i actually at one point felt like smacking her, she has no right to look so good after giving birth - BITCH

Kamasutra: lol HB Beth is gorgeous

Vlam: where are these photo's??

Bettyboob says: i also wanna see photos

Faulty says: right kid one down for nap, kid two is at school

Bettyboob says: ha ha peace and quiet~

Faulty says: sheesh Boss lady is sleeping in late today hey and i see S too, or they just hiding from me. i sang to them last night

Bettyboob says: bwahahahaha OMG Faulty

Faulty says: no i didnt only joking, but i did bug them horrible
u all nearly got a phone call on Saturday but keith hid my phone
he told me u were all sleeping

Bettyboob says: bwahaha OMG shame man, how could he lie to you like that?

Faulty says: i know even A (the client) kept saying shame man and then he was gonna let me use his phone

Bettyboob says: eish Faulty, you must write our numbers down somewhere so if he pulls that stunt again, you can still phone us lol
is B pregnat aggain?

Faulty says: no she not preg but she just admitted she hopes to fall preg soon

Kamasutra says: I personally think she must take a break for a while and if she gets pregnant again she must keep it quite for a while

Bettyboob says: did you see what happened to B again this weekend? that child has alot of accidents :(

Kamasutra says: yip and it seems whenever the dad's around hey

Bettyboob says: yes, it's odd

Kamasutra says: I know yes, not that I mean anything by it, men are just not as protected as woman are

Bettyboob says: no same here, just wondering out loud lol
i just watched a video clip of a anaconda putting a child

Kamasutra says: like this weekend,R thinks its very funny that our jack russel wants to bite D's tottie

Bettyboob says: oops

Kamasutra says: and I don't what if he bites it off

Bettyboob says: WTF monna that's just wrong lol, reminds me of Hunnibunni's dog

Kamasutrasays: exactly, HB’s got weird pets lol - no offence

Bettyboob says: she does

Kamasutra says: Jaggi do you know **********? he just walked into our office,one very drunk night I smooched him and it was so imbaressing now lol he's looking for honeymoon packages but couldn't look him in the eye so gave him to another consultant

Jaggi says: :Ddont think i know him Kamasutra...

Kamasutra says: george is way too small

Tipsy Tart says: who abuses their child? oh and i just told B mom i think she should take a break, i mean HONESTLY is she fucking STUPID

Jaggi: YES!!! I agree completely!! Whats the rush anyway?? She should chill for a few months

Tipsy Tart says: well that confirms that she is even more stupid

Faulty says: Socks is gonna come into the chat k, she didnt cheat on him - i asked her straight out

Tipsy Tart says: bwha good to know, i was worried hey lol

Socks says: hiiiiiiii

Faulty says: Kamasutra this is my cousin Socks she is my slave - say hi slave

Socks says: ha ha that sounds kinky

Kamasutra says: hallo Socks aka slave

Socks says: ha ha hi Kamasutra

Jaggi says: I am waiting for the whips and chains to be hauled out slave!!! (chuckle) hiya Socks!
Later that same fateful day............................

Tipsy Tart says: wheres Socks gone Faulty?

Socks says: im here:)

Tipsy Tart says: ok Socks what happened over the weekend? i will give u advice coz ive been cheated on and dumped MANY times and i can help with plotting revenge etc

Socks says: oooh um no i dont need advice, we just broke up -i had wine last night :) so im ok lol

Tipsy Tart says: best thing to do is to vry with his new gf

Tartlet says: you would do that HB

Tipsy Tart says: ok but jokes aside shannon - if you wanna talk u can talk to us, well to me, the rest are nerds - im cool..........ive been around ;)

Tartlet says: and around and around.......

Faulty says: hey i am cool, i gave her booze and pain tabs

Tipsy Tart says: but i dont like your socks

Tartlet: truth hurts hey

Faulty says: shew lucky i am a good girl

Tartlet says: whatttttttttttttttttttttttt

Socks says: ppfffttt